Sara & Sara

Have you ever dated someone with the same name as you? I suppose it can happen with straight people: Chris & Chris, Aaron & Erin, Joe & Jo, but it seems more likely with gays and lesbians.

My good friend Sara just married her girlfriend Sara. I’ve been friends with Sara for many years. I’ve seen her through a few girlfriends. I remember when she dated someone with the same name as her mother. “This will never work,” I thought. And I was right. The name probably had nothing to do with it.

But now Sara is married to another Sara. Sara is lovely. Sara’s best match yet. The problem is how do we refer to each of them? We’ve taken to calling the one who was our friend first “our Sara.” And her partner, “the other Sara.” But that just doesn’t seem nice. Aren’t they both “our Saras” now?

We can’t say “tall Sara” or “dark haired Sara.” That makes it seem like one is short, or the other blonde. For a while one was “Horse Sara,” but now they’re both horse people. Some people suggested Sara K. and Sara W. I suppose that works.

One thing is for sure, they certainly can’t hyphenate or change their last names. That would be a nightmare to all of us.

But Sara says, “We don’t have any problem knowing who we’re referring to.” Which I guess is the most important.